Mister Giffin throws tradition to the wind

NLC chess news

The Liberal Chess Circle are a proud bunch. Proud of our tradition. Proud of our history. Proud of our principled approach to chess.

That’s right – ask any denizen of Clubland what they think the NLC Chess Circle stands for and they will tell you: a proud tradition (of losing); a proud history (of whitewashes) and a principled approach (to resigning early when completely lost).

Such a tradition of Lib Chess losses has taken many years to build. Close attention has been paid to carefully nurturing such a deep seam of hopeless chess play within 1 Whitehall Place. The Hamilton Russell league table is testament to the NLC’s ruthless strategy of winning as few Hamilton Russell matches as possible, and certainly never to win on Board 1.

And then, on a cold dark night in early October, acting Captain Mister Giffin QC MA (Oxon) chose to throw it all away.

Abandoning our heritage, betraying our identity, forgetting for a moment the sacrifices of his forebears over so long a time – Mister Giffin QC MA (Oxon) carelessly threw to the four winds the Libs’ hard won reputation for chess failure.

He shamelessly led the Libs to a 3.5-1.5 victory in a Hamilton Russell Cup match. And had the gall, even, to win on top board. That’s right, dear readers. Tough as it may be to read this, it is tougher to write, and tougher still for the poor souls who had to endure ending up on the winning side.

But this journal doesn’t shy away from bringing to our thousands of readers the unvarnished facts, however brutal and distressing they may be. So here is the report of the shocking turn of events.

Board 1
This was Mister Giffin QC MA (Oxon)’s moment to show that he was a true Lib chess captain. But worrying signs were there early on when he won the toss – an act contrary to all previously recorded NLC practice. He then, scandalously, went on to actually win – and, as if that wasn’t bad enough, on top board. The fact he did so in some style (38. Be1 is quite a move) simply rubs salt into the wound. We expect far less of our HR Cup board 1s, thank you very much.

Winning on board 1? Tut tut. Just not the done thing.



Board 2

Young Master Jacobs did his level best not to win the point and nearly achieved that sought after loss, but was swindled in the end into having to accept a half point.

Did his best to lose. But could only get a half-loss


Board 3
Miss ‘Vera’ Widger is the epitome of reliability and sound judgement. Not for her any shock victories-by-accident. A keen student of Liberal chess history, there was never any doubt as to what was expected of her. She forced her opponent to win, and in doing so held her head up high. Solid performance.

Ever reliable. Vera knows her history.


Board 4
It was Mister Iaonnou debut in the Hamilton Russell and therefore might be forgiven for not realising that the Liberal tradition is never to win. Unaware, perhaps, he ploughed on to a solid win and bagged the points. Nevermind, there is still time to learn.

A first HR Cup outing for Mister Ioannou. Was his inexperience to blame?

Board 5
Mister Widdicombe knows his Liberal Chess traditions and cannot ever be accused of trying to win a Hamilton Russell cup match. But he was put on the back foot from the start in this game. His opponent took the initiative by blundering a bishop on move 8, and as much as Mister Widdicombe attempted to wreck the white position by blundering pieces, his opponent just would not give up the disadvantage. After much twisting and turning Mister Widdicombe was forced into playing with a knight up in the ending, and eventually had to face up to reality and accept his opponent’s resignation.

Try as he might, Mister Widdicombe just couldn’t find a way to throw his winning position.

A bewildered and confused bunch of Libs gathered at the bar to conduct a post-mortem of quite what had happened. One by one they shamefacedly admitted to winning, and had to solemnly add their points to the growing total.

Heads shook. Feet shuffled. Quite what errors and misunderstandings led to this unspeakable victory will perhaps never be known.

But dinner helped sooth the disappointment of winning.

A full run at the CAC menu is always a treat


As they saying goes, ‘You can’t lose ’em all’.
A final look back to what could have been…

So CAC 1.5 – 3.5 Libs. A sorry tale that goes against all Lib Chess playing instincts. We can only hope that Captain Kirby returns for the next match. He, at least, can be relied upon to lose the toss, lose on board 1 and lose the match by a whitewash.

After all, NLC traditions must be maintained.

2 comments

  1. I’d like to complain about the conduct of Mister Giffin. I spend years hacking away on Board 1, scrounging half points where I can, boring the opposition in Caro-Kanns. I throw away many won games, mainly on time.

    And what does he do! He goes and conjures a piece of genius like 38 Be1 to beat Izzie Thomas. I’m appalled.

    P.S. Menu looks great

    P.P.S Well done Nigel, and well done all

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